Monday, 4 April 2011

‘It looks like a Sesame Street crack den in here’’re probably wondering where I’ve been? Perhaps you thought/hoped that blogging was a passing phase in my oh so hectic life. But no, here I am, back again! 

My absence is due to two things 1: I have gone back to work and 2: Poor Finn has been ill (again). Since the hospital incident we’ve had; an ear infection, a chest infection, conjunctivitis an eczema flare up and two new teeth. Put it this way, when my brother came to visit last week, he took one look around my tissue strewn flat, replete with several multi-coloured plastic medicine syringes and said ‘it looks like a Sesame Street crack den in here’.

Finn seems to be better now, so I have finally been able to step back and survey the wreckage. It seems the main casualty of weeks of not sleeping properly and sitting at a desk eating krispy kreme four days a week is my waist line. I am fatter now than at any point since just after the baby was born. I have exchanged eyeliner for dark circles and hot polish cleanser for a quick swipe with a baby wipe and basically I look crap. 

My new found lack of self confidence was compounded the other day when I had dinner with one of my most glamorous friends. He has the kind of life that I like to imagine could have been mine if I’d had cooler parents. He goes to showbiz parties, has celebrity friends and wears designer clothes – I am obviously so jealous it hurts. Anyway, he reminded me of a time when I used to make an effort, when my roots weren’t three inches long and I actually cared if my socks matched. 

When I look at myself these days, I can scarcely believe that it is me. I’m a good stone heavier than I was before, I rarely do my hair and I recycle the same few outfits week in week out because they are the only ones that fit. So I’ve made a decision, I’m going to lose the weight, probably not all of it but I’m going to give it a go. I’ll let you know how I get on.